CALGARY SUN (Alberta) 05 October 08 Fangs for the memories (Mike Drew)
Please feel free to write in and tell me how stupid I am.
I deserve it for any number of reasons but for this latest thing, yeah, feel free to heap on the scorn. I was driving along a road on the north side of the Red Deer River out near Buffalo when I saw a ripply stick laying near the ditch. A ripply stick that on closer inspection was about three-feet long and had rattles on one end.
Yep, a lovely fat specimen of prairie rattlesnake. They, and nearly everything else that hibernates, are heading to their winter dens to wait out the cold months. But on this day last week, the temperature was warm, summertime warm, and the rattler was just laying by the side of the road soaking up the autumn heat.
It barely moved as I stepped out of the truck to take some pictures and after lying there for a few minutes, it just eased itself into the grass and coiled up around a clump of sagebrush. It hardly even buzzed, even when I got down onto my knees to take some tight, close-up pictures.
That's generally true with rattlesnakes -- or any other animal for that matter. If you are non-threatening and don't make any sudden moves, most things will tolerate your presence for at least a couple of moments. I wouldn't try that with grizzlies or buffalo but common sense does come into play as well.
So I was feeling pretty good as I hopped back into the truck. It was a gorgeous day, the leaves along the Red Deer River were shimmering and golden, the antelope hadn't yet been spooked all over the country by the hunters and I had some not-bad rattlesnake pictures. Yeah, pretty good.
So when I saw the next ripply stick about a hundred metres further up the road, I felt absolutely confident as I stepped out of the truck, video camera in hand.
This one was tiny, less than half the length of the first rattler, more the size of a steroidal garter snake. It was lying in the middle of the road and not moving, so I lay down on the gravel to get some pictures at snake-eye level.
Immediately it went from torpor to full-on defensive mode, rearing up and hissing and sidling away backwards. I lay still and gave it a few seconds to calm down but as soon as I moved it reared up again and then sidled past me a couple of feet away.
I would gladly have left it alone but it went right past me and coiled up practically underneath one of my front tires. I couldn't drive away without crushing it and I couldn't wait parked in the middle of the road until it decided to move on. Could've been there for hours.
So I grabbed my monopod out of the back of the truck and fished it out and carried it to the side of the road.
Had I stopped there, all I would have been guilty of was annoying a rattlesnake. Bad enough, I guess, but I swear I wasn't trying to harass it. Feel free to disagree.
But no, it was coiled up so nicely where I dropped it at the side of the road that I just had to take a couple more pictures. Out came the video camera and Mike hit the dirt.
I eased myself toward the snake, watching the camera's monitor and trying to compose the little rattler and it's grassy background. I was just about to hit the record button when, BAM, the snake struck.
My own fault, I know. I was way too close and the snake was far too agitated. My only excuse is that I was looking at the image on the video screen and not at the snake.
To say that it was fast does a disservice to the speed of that little rattler. It stretched out and recoiled before I could even react and it startled me so badly that my heart is racing even as I'm typing this out four days later.
You see, the thing is, it not only struck at. It hit me. Right on the knuckle of my left thumb. But in a gesture of rattlesnake benevolence that I most assuredly did not deserve, it hit with its mouth closed. No bite, no venom.
Well, I assume its mouth was closed. I couldn't actually see. But it hit me hard enough to sting and I looked all over my thumb to see if there was a bite mark. Nothing there.
I'd been laying on my stomach when the rattler struck, but now I found myself sitting on my butt five feet further back with no recollection of having moved. Guess when the adrenalin hits even a chunky, middle-aged guy can move pretty quickly, too.
With shaking hands I retrieved the camera -- dragging it by its strap -- shot a bit more shaky video and hopped back into the truck. The little rattler was safe for now at the side of the road and anyway, I'd annoyed it enough.

Paperboy note: My apologies for the erratic and scarce postings of late ... I'm just back from two weeks of shuttling between Vancouver and Ottawa in preparation for my mid-month move west. I should be back into production by early Nov. Wes
Fangs for the memories

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