I had my first attempt at breeding back in '94. I had a couple of king snakes, put them together, and nothing. I really didn't know what to expect back then but once you've seen breeding activity it's easily recognized. Most colubrids will immediately show a response when the timing is right. So I took my kings to a local IRBA show and asked one of the vendors that was selling kings if he could help. That was Rick Trenney of Renegade Reptils (RIP). One of the best in this hobby. We had a good laugh at that time and every year when I would see him at the show. I had a lesbian breeding pair, two females. He sold me a normal male that I had picked out. One of my females was an albino. As it turned out, the male was a het for albino and I got albinos my first year. Over the years, Rick helped whenever I asked.
If your dealing with vendors that aren't willing to help, then I think your dealing with the wrong vendors.
Pick up a set of probes, lubricant, some Purell hand cleaner, and a couple of paper towels. Bring it all to a show and ask your vendor for help. Ask when there is a lull at their table and you should have no problem getting a lesson. At some shows there are presentations and sometimes it is on sexing. One of the presenters may also be willing to give you a lesson after their presentation.
It's really not that difficult.

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• Learning to sex - Ashlandthunder, Sat Jul 12 23:19:42 2008
• RE: Learning to sex - brhaco, Sun Jul 13 07:19:01 2008
• RE: Learning to sex - John Q, Sun Jul 13 10:09:53 2008
• RE: Learning to sex - Ashlandthunder, Sun Jul 13 11:46:36 2008