You're right!,....they are VERY similar looking!
these snakes get confused with one another very often!
There are actually a few VERY distinct differences in these two snakes, but most of them are small, subtle differences.
The "emoryi" has a more distinct "chevroning"(arrowhead pattern)
on top of it's head when compared to the eastern, it has a less distinct filagree type pattern.
The eyes on emoryi are also slightly larger than Eastern Milks, in addition to having a slightly longer, more tapering nose with a more distinct band across the eye/nose area.
Easterns eyes many times have a rusty, to very vivid red/orange iris, as compared to emoryi's tannish colored irisis.
Easterns necks are a little more thicker, and robust than emoryi, especially in adults, as with all the "Lampropeltis" group(milks and kings) they are more built to over-power prey such as other snakes(thus the name kingsnake).
Another pattern difference not seen when looking at the snake from the top would be the belly pattern. On Easterns, they have more of a "mottled", random pattern of small blotching, rather than a more distinct pattern of "checkering as in cornsnakes, and emoryi.
And several big differences in scalation(meristics) are evident in these two snakes as well. The anal plate is divided in two on emoryi, whereas it is a single plate on all Lampropeltis, including the Eastern Milksnake.
So although they do indeed look alike in many ways, these are some of the differences that set these two snakes apart from one another.
Hope this helped a little!
best regards, ~Doug

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"Better to be silent and thought a fool, than to open mouth and remove any doubt!"