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I hope someone can help me. I have read a couple of books on keeping ball pythons as pets. It just so happens that a guy I work with has two Ball Pythons he is willing to give me for free. This includes all the accessories also. He said if I don't take them he will have them destroyed. My wife has agreed to let me get them so they can be saved. But she is deathly afraid of snakes. She has stated that they are to remain in my office at home. And if one of them ever gets out that will be it and I will have to get rid of them. Does anyone have any ideas on how I can convince her that these are not mean snakes by nature. Any ideas or comments will be greatly appreciated Thanks for your time and input in advance.

There is not clear way of convincing someone who is this scared of snakes. I would say try and get her to look at the snakes in the cage and get used to be around them in this manner. Once she is comfortable with them in their cage, get one out and hadnle it around her. Let her watch you from a distance as you handle the snakes. Hopefully in time, she will want to "pet" the snake, and that may finally show her that they are not out to hurt her. Only with alot of patience and time will someone with a fear, get used to having them around. Hope this helps.
Jason

I used to be absolutely terrified of snakes. Now I own 12 of my own and live in a house with 40.

I got into reptiles a few years ago, after watching many episodes of the Croc Hunter. I decided to get a lizard. My mom wasn't keen on the idea of any reptiles in the house but she put up with the frogs and the lizards. After about a year of the lizards, I finally got up the nerve to hold a snake. I think back and laugh now, because I was shaking like a leaf while holding a little 9 inch Kenyan Sand Boa (Good thing, I only learned recently that their bite hurts WORSE than alot of bigger snakes ) After that I went in almost everyday to hold that same darn snake. Finally I bought it. I had it for three weeks before my mom found it. LOL. She was not happy but she would pet it and the summer I was gone on my internship, she fed and watered it along with the geckos. By the time I was done with school and I moved out, I had aquired 5 snakes. (ok, so she didn't realize that there were 5 snakes in the house) her biggest fear was that they would get out. So I made sure that I had extra clamps on the cage PLUS I placed some heavy books on the cage (Knew there was a reason I kept my physics book )

I worked in a Pet store for two years and I managed to get many people over their fear of snakes. I would usually start with just talking to them about the snakes and then when they were ready pull one out of the cage. I always chose one of the calmer snakes for this. I let them touch the tail first, with the head outta site. For some reason this worked. I had several customers who wanted snakes but their spouse was to afraid to let them have one. After working with them and showing them that snakes are not mean evil nasty creatures, many of these people now have snakes. Granted it took longer with some than others. One guy it took him a year before his wife finally agreed.

I think that if you work with her, slowly. Talk with her about the snakes. She will finally come around, she may be like my mom and my buddy's wife and just tolerate them in the house but she may be like me and want a few of her own.
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2.9.8 Leopard Geckos
1.2.1 African Fat-tails
0.1 Gonisaurus Luii
1.1 Central American Banded Geckos
0.1 Gargoyle Gecko
1.1 Calabar Pythons
1.1 Savu Pythons
0.0.2 Cornsnakes
0.1.2 Chondropythons
0.1 Standing's Day Gecko
1.0 Frog-eyed Gecko
1.1 Ball Pythons

Number one, good for her that she is willing to let you have them just for the rescue aspect!! that's a great start!

I agree, that the more she is around them, the more used to them she will get. we have one, and he's still pretty small, and we have the rule that when anyone comes over, if someone is not comfortable with him being out, he stays in the tank to be admired. BUT, if they are curious about him, and OK him being out, the kids always reach right in to socialize a bit. we have educated most of our guests, and some that used to be fearful now hold him - and love the experience. We have had children touch him (toddlers) and adults pet him. He's not headshy at all, and loves the attention. He will wrap around anyone he can reach, and changes hands frequently without any coaxing. Just offer him a hand, and he'll go visit you! He's very calm while being held, always relaxed, and takes the education process very well. He sits patiently while the newcomer gets adjusted, and when they relax, he seems to feel the difference, and starts to move a little at a time, working with them.

She'll come around. We have even had people ask if they can come over to watch him eat - more education, therefore more people loving our reptiles, and wanting to research the different types, and less fear all the way around!

enjoy your new babies!

Muggle
Material Witness

Coincidently I was having a discussion with a friend earlier regarding people with a dislike of snakes or an irrational fear there of. It is my opinion, after observing my peers and their families for the last 20 or so years, that people are not born with a fear of snakes (or other creatures) but learn it from their parents or other family members. Usually the parents of such individuals are misinformed or ignorant about the behavior and natural history of snakes. Sometimes however this is combined with a bad experience with a snake that has lead to the fear or renforced it. I thought the other suggestions people gave you were very good but I'd like to add a couple on the lines of my above statements. Discuss with your wife why she does not like snakes. You may find that her answer reflects what I have written above. She may think they are slimy, dirty, viscious, or any other number of things. Discuss with her why snakes are none of those things and maybe discuss what it might be like interacting with the environment and with humans from the snakes point of view (anthropomorphize only as much as necessary to make the point). If your wife doesn't seem comfortable with this sort of dicussion perhaps lend her one of your book about ball pythons. Maybe she would like to read it and discuss it with you. Maybe not. It never hurts to ask. Obviously don't push your snakes on your wife or be argumentative but at least try and get her to be informed about them and maybe she will change her mind or at least tolerate them. Good luck

That what I was going to say. My best friend was deathly afraid of snakes and couldn't even be in the same house as them which was pretty inconveniant! But after talking to him and finding out what bothered him (thought they were dangerous, could hurt him, eat him, kill him etc!) he was able to be in the same house and eventually the same room. He can look at one now in it's enclosure but still has a problem holding a book as it's like holding a snake he says and he's just not ready for that. Take your time and don't rush it.

i had a similar experience with my girlfriend, she wanted nothing to do with my boas, only went to reptile shows 'because you're (me) into it', etc.

i didn't push anything onto her, barely even talked about them around her, fed on days she was at work, etc...

after a month or so of them living in room whose door was *always* shut or she'd be really uncomfortable, she actually started asking me about them, and she said that it was the way i talked about them that allowed her to get over her fears.

my biggest boa is now "hers"... except on feeding days, she still doesn't like that, but she loves my snakes now!

so, to sum up my experience, you don't have to push anything, just call them your 'kids', talk to her about them if she shows interest, and in time, she'll steal them from you!

good luck!

bc

hello
i have to agree with all of the wonderful replys to your question, i agree with all of them, i would highly recament not to let her see you feeding the snake, and don't make her watch or make it like a superbowl night when you do, do it quietly and don't speak much of it to her, also get as much info that you can and let her see that you really into learning about the snake, when you get some info you get excited about tell her she may want to see why your are for lack of a better word, ignoring her, i know i have had a wonderful experience from working in pet stores for the last few years, i have had ppl sweat like an opened fire hidrant and pass out, just knowing the snake was in the store, but it seemed that the more i learned on them and talked to them the more they wanted to know, and within in a moth or two they where calling me saying "i have got to have a snake now", and they ended up being my best customers, i would also recament that if she is really afraid try getting a baby corn that is well established with feeding and let her start out small, cause i am only assuming the the ball oythons your friend has are a bit larger, corns rule in my book as a snake fear breaker, the brighter the better like amels, but that is what has worked for me and i wish you the best on your situation, also i would recamend a snake that is eating prekilled rodents, i have found that the though of feeding live,( in women ), is one of the major choices on why they dislike them, so good luck , and plz keep us posted

one more thing,
be 100% honest with her and don't tell her that snakes or ball pythons will not or never bite, they are reptiles, if the question comes up , which it has on many occation with me, i usually respond something like will your dog bite, or your cat if prevocked, let her know that it is always a possibility, but with repeted handling and propere care it will be less likely to bite, and don't give her the look like "are you stupid, or thats a dumb question", if you do, most likley you will be looking for a new home with or with out a snake, good luck!!!!

My mom used to be really afraid of snakes, and she couldn't even look at them on TV. She really loves my bearded dragon and russian tortoise though. Just not snakes cause they are "slimy and slithery."

But just talking to her about reptiles and snakes, showing her how much I liked them, showing her pictures of baby corn snakes and whatnot, gradually made her lose her fear. One day she even petted a 9 foot burmese python! She saw two little kids petting its head like it was nothing, so I guess she was embarassed and had to touch it too. She was really surprised that it wasn't slimy.

Finally she allowed me to keep a snake in the house for the summer. She will hold my baby black ratsnake occasionally, but she still doesn't like it. She tolerates snakes but does not like them. She doesn't really mind little snakes but still dislikes big snakes, fat snakes, venomous snakes, or feeding snakes. Oh well, that's good enough from me. I'll be gone by the time my black rat gets big anyway.

My advice is, don't push snakes on your wife, and DON'T let her watch them eat. That can be a real turn off for people who are afraid of snakes. But gradually expose her to snakes at her comfort level and eventually she will tolerate them, if not like them.

Dear new To Snakes,
when I first started dating my boyfriend, I too was weary of snakes.
Today I am helping him start a snake breeding buisness, and i am a proud ownerof two ball pythons.
So what happened? Basically bp's are the friendliest of all snakes. They have never tried to bite, are low maintenance, remain small (max of 5 feet). They couldn't injure a person if they tried so if they did get out it's not like they would be able to hurt you.
I won't deny: there are snakes that are dangerous, that are not friendly, and are not for beginners. Ball Pythons aren't one of them.
I hope things work out for you and your new little friends.
P.S. i think it's kind of crumby that your friend at work would destroy the poor little guys if you and your wife decided not to take him. Please let him know that are many people and places that are willing to accept unwanted animals.
-BPG

Nah. My husband doesn't really like the snakes or lizards either (he's a mammal lover) but after some time he's finally consented that they are interesting. Just give it some time and maybe watch some animal shows on TV about snakes. Check out books and buy magazines. Eventually she won't have anything to read and she'll pick one up.

Hehe, or tell her you think snakes are sexy.
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All my Children: 0.2 female humans (1 is 10 and the other is a 6 month old hatchling), 1 Saint Bernard, 2 maine coons, 15 leopard geckos, 1 pacman frog, 1 oscar, 1 jack dempsey, 1.1 ball pythons, and "Lilith" the black meowing kitty