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How do you hold your cat?

PHCurious Mar 17, 2003 11:09 AM

It just hit me that my husband and I hold our cats the way people hold human babies, but we do it differently. If I'm walking around the house with a cat in my arms, I hold them over my shoulder, in the position that you'd hold a baby you were trying to burp. My husband cradles them so that the cats are sort of laying on their backs.

Here's the funny part--If I try to hold them the way my husband does, they wiggle and squirm away. Same thing happens if my husband tries to hold them over his shoulder. I wish I could remember how these patterns started and who trained whom. Hmmmm.

Do your cats have specific ways in which they like to be held?

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PHCurious
Cat Chat Host

Replies (36)

shortstff467 Mar 17, 2003 04:05 PM

yup , Shorty is very definite about how she wants to be held. With the bigguy she wants to be cradeled like your husband does it. With me, sitting on my lap or on my arm leaning against my shoulder. Curiouse isnt it...
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Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Shorty

PHCurious Mar 17, 2003 09:53 PM

>>yup , Shorty is very definite about how she wants to be held. With the bigguy she wants to be cradeled like your husband does it. With me, sitting on my lap or on my arm leaning against my shoulder. Curiouse isnt it...

Hmmmm, could it be that men make better cradles than woman? Nah...

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PHCurious
Cat Chat Host

gocatgo Mar 17, 2003 04:13 PM

>>It just hit me that my husband and I hold our cats the way people hold human babies, but we do it differently. If I'm walking around the house with a cat in my arms, I hold them over my shoulder, in the position that you'd hold a baby you were trying to burp. My husband cradles them so that the cats are sort of laying on their backs.
>>
>>Here's the funny part--If I try to hold them the way my husband does, they wiggle and squirm away. Same thing happens if my husband tries to hold them over his shoulder. I wish I could remember how these patterns started and who trained whom. Hmmmm.
>>
>>Do your cats have specific ways in which they like to be held?>-----
>>PHCurious
>>Cat Chat Host

Very good question. I'd never thought of it before but now that you mention it, all of my cats are different with different members of the family, except maybe Simba. He's such a lover-boy that he'll let anybody hold him anyway that they want and for as long as they want. He even lets Paula dress him up in clothes so I don't think that he would even count in this survey.

Samantha is my 'baby' kitty cat. She loves to be cradled in my arms like a baby, on her back, kneading and purring the whole time. It looks like she goes into a trance when she does this and she demands this attention from me at least a couple of times per day. However, she will not let anybody else hold her like this. She usually won't let anybody else hold her at all. Paula calls her 'The Mean One'.

Katrina does not like to be held at all. She's the one who prefers to lie on top of a person when they're in a prone postition. She also loves to lie on a book or magazine when you're trying to read it. If you try to hold her, she wiggles and squeals like a little pig, demanding to be put down.

KatyKatt is another who doesn't like to be held. She'll let me hold her for a few seconds, only because she loves me and trusts me but I can tell that she doesn't like it. She does lie on my feet and sleeps all cuddled up to me, purring me to sleep, but no holding her is allowed. She's another who will lay on the book or magazine that you're trying to read, begging to be petted.

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Ruby and the Kitties
Simba, Samantha, Katrina & KatyKatt
Meow!! Meow!! Meow!! Meow!!

PHMadameAlto Mar 17, 2003 08:19 PM

Captain Video does not like to be held much or carried at all. He will jump on a lap if available. Chelsea was the "hold me" kitty. She loved to be carried like a burping baby and would head butt your chin.

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Smile, it will make them wonder what you are up to!

PHCurious Mar 17, 2003 10:10 PM

Ruby, I want to see pictures of Simba after Paula has dressed him! LOL!

It's interesting that your cats not only like to be held in different ways, but in different ways by different people. Interesting.

Madame Alto, my "baby burping" cat doesn't like to be held if I'm sitting or standing still. But if I walk with him over my shoulder, he loves it. I haven't figured this one out either. But that's the way he likes it, so that's what he gets.

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PHCurious
Cat Chat Host

gocatgo Mar 17, 2003 10:45 PM

>>Ruby, I want to see pictures of Simba after Paula has dressed him! LOL!
>>
Curious, I have many pictures of Simba dressed by Paula but need to scan them and put on hard drive. However here's one that I shown before but will be glad to show it to you.

This is Simba dressed in a Christmas sweater.

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Ruby and the Kitties
Simba, Samantha, Katrina & KatyKatt
Meow!! Meow!! Meow!! Meow!!

gocatgo Mar 17, 2003 10:51 PM

And here's another of Simba dressed by Paula. This is one of his Halloween pictures. Can you see how much he enjoys all of this attention? He comes up to her all the time, crawls up in her lap and just purrs his little heart out. He absolutely LOVES attention! He's just laying there on the bed beside Paula, happy as a bug in a rug, posing for the picture.

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Ruby and the Kitties
Simba, Samantha, Katrina & KatyKatt
Meow!! Meow!! Meow!! Meow!!

shortstff467 Mar 17, 2003 11:22 PM

That is one cute kitty, and what a beautiful smile on Paula
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Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Shorty

gocatgo Mar 17, 2003 11:48 PM

That is one cute kitty, and what a beautiful smile on Paula
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>>Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Shorty

Well thank you, Shorty. And what about you? Have I seen a picture of you yet? I really don't recall seeing any and would like to.

Here's another picture of Simba and Paula.


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Ruby and the Kitties
Simba, Samantha, Katrina & KatyKatt
Meow!! Meow!! Meow!! Meow!!

PHCurious Mar 18, 2003 09:48 AM

OK, that's it. You've just posted the cutest pictures I've ever seen. LOL, Simba must be an incredibly laid back cat to allow Paula to dress him up like this! Hahaha. How adorable. It's clear these two have a very special relationship.

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PHCurious
Cat Chat Host

shortstff467 Mar 18, 2003 02:52 PM

No yu haffent seen any picks uf me, dat be kawse mommy donts got a way to load dem..One uf dese days when she gots time she gonna gaffur dem up an send dem to Munchie to do fur hur....Luff Shorty an dat is weally a bootiful smile, jus ear to ear!
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Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Shorty

karlacue Mar 18, 2003 05:09 PM

Well, well...In general my kitties don't like being held at all. Daisy in particular (I guess she still has some trust issues, poor kitty must have suffered a lot). But, sometimes when Bob is in 'pay attention to me' mood and meowing like crazy I usually hold him up. He wiggles away from my arms, and then he acommodates himself on top of my shoulders/upper back!!! Of course with his weight that leaves me looking like Quasimodo, but he enjoys this a lot because he can see EXACTLY what I am doing from that point of view...Nosy cat? Nahhh
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Bob, Daisy, Karla and the Goldfish

gocatgo Mar 18, 2003 07:49 PM

>>Well, well...In general my kitties don't like being held at all. Daisy in particular (I guess she still has some trust issues, poor kitty must have suffered a lot).

Sometimes they are just born shy like that! I noticed that with both Katrina and KatyKatt. I do know that neither of them have trust issues because they are Samantha's kittens and I've had them from birth. The first couple of years in their life, it was nobody here but me so I know that they've never been abused or mistreated. I do believe that it's a genetic thing, most likely from their father, because Samantha is outgoing although very independent.

But, sometimes when Bob is in 'pay attention to me' mood and meowing like crazy I usually hold him up. He wiggles away from my arms, and then he acommodates himself on top of my shoulders/upper back!!! Of course with his weight that leaves me looking like Quasimodo, but he enjoys this a lot because he can see EXACTLY what I am doing from that point of view...Nosy cat? Nahhh

Now that's exactly the position that KatyKatt and Katrina like. That way they're are not being held by you but I think that they love to be near you and are in control when they are ON YOU! So really they are being held, but it's on THEIR TERMS. And that's the way that I see your Bob - HE'S IN CONTROL THAT WAY! They are all such silly kitty cats with a mind of their own.


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Ruby and the Kitties
Simba, Samantha, Katrina & KatyKatt
Meow!! Meow!! Meow!! Meow!!

PHCurious Mar 19, 2003 02:05 PM

Eh, I don't really want people picking me up either. :-X
I think some cats want to hold us rather than be held. Or at least sit on top of us so they know they have our undivided attention.

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PHCurious
Cat Chat Host

gocatgo Mar 18, 2003 08:02 PM

>>No yu haffent seen any picks uf me, dat be kawse mommy donts got a way to load dem..One uf dese days when she gots time she gonna gaffur dem up an send dem to Munchie to do fur hur....Luff Shorty an dat is weally a bootiful smile, jus ear to ear!
>>-----
>>Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Shorty

Well Shorty, if and when you ever get them done and do post them, please make sure that you find me so that I can see them too. Is there only one of you kitty cats? And are you SHORT? Are you black, black and white, orange, tortoiesshell, white or all of the above? Do you have long, long hair that you get all over your Mommy's clothes when she holds you, like Simba and Daisy?

And thanks for the compliment about the beautiful smile but were you talking about Simba or Paula?

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Ruby and the Kitties
Simba, Samantha, Katrina & KatyKatt
Meow!! Meow!! Meow!! Meow!!

Midask9 Mar 18, 2003 10:48 PM

Back to the holding cats thing...Well, with Mia it is a non-issue, she is not "people friendly". Fluffy is nearly 14#, and he isn't much for being held either, I am assuming it is that because of his size, it is hard for him to get comfortable in a position that is "trustworthy". (My arms get tired, can only hold that much kitty for so long). Smudge also isn't much for being held, but I can on occasion, but she is a "sit on the lap" kitty, no cradling, no baby burping, etc. Banzai is pretty tolerant of most anyone, and you can carry/hold her however you want to, for a while. Then she is done, and has better things that need attention. Doesn't matter if it is me or the hubby, same story, I think she is an ADD kitty <G>. Hazy simply cannot be held, she won't tolerate it at all, she growls and scratches, and scrambles to get away. She will sit in your lap tho, if you are patient. This brings me to Liger, is my "baby boy". I can cradle him, prop him over my shoulder, hold him on my lap, everything just short of carrying him around by his tail is fine with him. BUT, with my hubby, he will occasionally bless him by sitting on his lap, but would NEVER dream of allowing him to cradle him or "baby burp" him. He just isn't that fond of dh I guess?? He trusts him somewhat, but not in the way he trusts me (fully). Not sure what causes the dynamics to work the way they do with the furkids, but it is neat! And I had never really thought much about it either. Thanks for making me think for a change <G>.
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Mia Liger Fluffy Banzai Smudge Hazy
& Midas ~ Golden Retriever and honorary cat

pmantone Mar 19, 2003 08:50 AM

Boris will also tolerate my hubby and will actually let hubby hold him when I am not at home. However, when I get home, he completely ignores hubby and becomes the "mama's boy" that he is noted for. Last night was the first time that Boris actually got jealous when I kissed hubby. Boris could not stand it and demanded that I pick him up immediately. When I did he started licking my neck as usual and kept batting my husband's hand away from me. We both just died laughing when we realized that he was upset because he was not getting the attention. Nah- he is not spoiled at all! (grin)
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Boris's Human

PHCurious Mar 19, 2003 01:59 PM

>> Last night was the first time that Boris actually got jealous when I kissed hubby. Boris could not stand it and demanded that I pick him up immediately. When I did he started licking my neck as usual and kept batting my husband's hand away from me.

OK, do we have a funniest post of the day award? This one should win! Hahaha. Boris sounds adorable. I'll bet he keeps you entertained in many different ways....as long as he's shown the proper attention that is.

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PHCurious
Cat Chat Host

gocatgo Mar 19, 2003 02:53 PM

>>>> Last night was the first time that Boris actually got jealous when I kissed hubby. Boris could not stand it and demanded that I pick him up immediately. When I did he started licking my neck as usual and kept batting my husband's hand away from me.
>>
>>OK, do we have a funniest post of the day award? This one should win! Hahaha. Boris sounds adorable. I'll bet he keeps you entertained in many different ways....as long as he's shown the proper attention that is.
>>
>>-----
>>PHCurious
>>Cat Chat Host

I agree! That is just too funny. I'll have to admit that although my cats get jealous of each other, I've never seen them get jealous of a human. You must have a lot of fun with Boris - he's a hoot!

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Ruby and the Kitties
Simba, Samantha, Katrina & KatyKatt
Meow!! Meow!! Meow!! Meow!!

pmantone Mar 18, 2003 12:54 PM

Basically, I think Boris holds me more than I hold him. He stretches and puts his front paws on my legs just to let me know that if I don't pick him up immediately, he will get his own way up-and the claws in the legs do not feel good. Once I get him up, he has to put his paws around my neck and I support his backside while he lays there and licks my neck. This is our normal routine in the morning while I am making coffee-supporting him with my left arm and making coffee with the right hand. He refuses to be cradled and when I am holding him, it must always be in an upright position with my neck readily available for "kitty kisses". Since he now weighs over 8 lbs, all that weight in one arm gets a little bit heavy, especially when he wants to sit up on my arm while I am holding him.

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Boris's Human

PHCurious Mar 19, 2003 02:08 PM

>> Since he now weighs over 8 lbs, all that weight in one arm gets a little bit heavy, especially when he wants to sit up on my arm while I am holding him.


How old is Boris? He looks like a big boy, large paw pads and all. If he's still a kitten and has a lot more growing to do, you're going to develop some mighty strong left arm muscles.

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PHCurious
Cat Chat Host

pmantone Mar 19, 2003 08:21 PM

Boris just turned six months old. We have noticed the huge front feet and just wonder how much more he will grow. My vet simply states that he is going to be a "fair-sized" cat. He is already heavy and quite muscular. But he just won't be held any other way. He also will not sit in the lap either-he has to be upright with his hind feet perched on my tummy with the paws around the neck so he can lick it. Do you have any idea as to why he doese this? He has licked my neck from the time I brought him home. He won't lick anyone else's neck-just mine. I have never had a cat do this.
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Boris's Human

PHCurious Mar 21, 2003 12:57 PM

>>Boris just turned six months old. We have noticed the huge front feet and just wonder how much more he will grow. My vet simply states that he is going to be a "fair-sized" cat. He is already heavy and quite muscular. But he just won't be held any other way. He also will not sit in the lap either-he has to be upright with his hind feet perched on my tummy with the paws around the neck so he can lick it. Do you have any idea as to why he doese this? He has licked my neck from the time I brought him home. He won't lick anyone else's neck-just mine. I have never had a cat do this.

The only real answer to this question is: Because that's the way he likes it! Only Boris could tell us exactly what he specifically likes about licking your neck, but even if he could speak English, he might not be certain what is drawing him to that particular spot. (We all enjoy some things for which we're not able to pinpoint the pleasurable component. I can't imagine cats would be any different.)

Here are some of my guesses:

Maybe he just likes having access to the same spot every day, and your neck is one area of your body that is rarely covered by clothing. Unlike your face or hands, which are also rarely covered, your neck is less likely to taste like lotion, make-up, dirt, etc...
Another guess--perfume is typically placed behind and underneathe the earlobe because the skin in that spot is often warm, the perfume interacts with the heartbeat there, and all of this somehow makes the perfume's scent travel further. (Don't ask me about the biophysics of this phenomenon, because I don't really know.) But it may be that this area of your body gives off a stronger scent that is perceptible to him than other areas of your body does.
Similarly, anyone who has worn a pearl necklace and not wiped them off knows that the neck area gives off a lot of body oils. (Why? Again, I don't know.) If you don't wipe off a string of pearls that have been adorning your neck, the pearls and the string will eventually disintegrate. Again, there may be something about your body oils that is attractive to him, and that spot is just perfect for him.
Also along the same lines, it's possible that the shampoo or conditioner you use leaves a fine residue on your neck, imperceptible to you but not to a fine-tuned cat. Maybe he's attracted to the smell or taste of your shampoo.
Maybe there's nothing about your neck, per se, that he particularly likes. Maybe it's just being in that position. Sitting on your lap and propping himself up on you like that gives him opportunity to feel your heartbeat, have a stable place to stand or be held, smell your breath, etc..
Finally, maybe it's just habit. He may have licked your neck when you first got him, was praised and petted for doing that, and has learned this as a rewarding behavior.

If only Boris could tell us.
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PHCurious
Cat Chat Host

gocatgo Mar 21, 2003 03:27 PM

Big Feet = Big Cat! Sounds like he's going to be a big boy!

Curious offered some good theories on why Boris prefers licking a certain spot on your neck and any one of them is possible or maybe even all of them. I have a theory that I'd like to add to her list:

Whenever Samantha kneads on me, she has to put her nose right up in my left armpit...then kneads away, purring her little heart out. I read that the human armpit smells just like the mama cats teat so that's why they do this.

Baby kittens knows which teat on the mama kitty is theirs and always go to their own teat. Maybe that spot on your neck is Boris's 'teat'? Just a thought. Too bad Boris can't talk.

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Ruby and the Kitties
Simba, Samantha, Katrina & KatyKatt
Meow!! Meow!! Meow!! Meow!!

PHCurious Mar 21, 2003 08:07 PM

>>Baby kittens knows which teat on the mama kitty is theirs and always go to their own teat. Maybe that spot on your neck is Boris's 'teat'? Just a thought. Too bad Boris can't talk.

I like this theory better than any I came up with! Although, I don't think I'll ever refer to any body part of my own as "teat-smelling" or "teat-like." Hee hee.

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PHCurious
Cat Chat Host

pmantone Mar 21, 2003 08:26 PM

I had thought of this to a degree since he will lick my neck for different reasons. First thing in the morning, when we bring him in from his kennel in the garage ( this is a whole other story that definitely would get the funniest award), he really goes to town and my husband has to hold him so he can lick my neck while I make his coffee. However, if either of us scolds him, he will jump up to be held, and lick my neck. He does it when he's hungry-he does it when he is frightened or strangers come into the house. So I figured that I must be a "surrogate mother cat".
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Boris's Human

gocatgo Mar 21, 2003 08:56 PM

He does it when he's hungry-he does it when he is frightened or strangers come into the house. So I figured that I must be a "surrogate mother cat".
>>Boris's Human

Yep, that explains it! You're his Mama kitty and your neck is his 'teat'. He loves you and he comes to you for comfort!

I'm lucky that Samantha just buries her nose in my armpit instead of licking it. She's almost five years old and is doing it a lot more now than when she was young so maybe Boris won't outgrow it either. They are both a couple of silly kitty cats. heeheehee.


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Ruby and the Kitties
Simba, Samantha, Katrina & KatyKatt
Meow!! Meow!! Meow!! Meow!!

PHCurious Mar 25, 2003 09:33 AM

I'd be very surprised if either Samantha or Boris "outgrew" these behaviors. You two are "Mom," and you'll always be the source of love and comfort. You've got great cats!

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PHCurious
Cat Chat Host

Gonzokat Apr 24, 2003 12:14 PM

ohhhh, another message board I have never seen.....

Gonzo I drape over my shoulder to support his size and weight. It is awkward any other way for him.

Stumpy I drape on my shoulders or cuddle up in front of me.

Tigger is calico.....she doesn't get held without her screeching like a hoot owl, so she is just patted on the top of the head.

gonzokat
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Gonzo, Tigger, and Stumpy

PHCurious Apr 25, 2003 11:31 AM

LOL! Welcome GonzoFamily!
Now let me get this straight. You're saying you don't carry 23 pound Gonzo around in the palm of one hand?

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PHCurious
Cat Chat Host

gonzokat Apr 25, 2003 04:04 PM

>>LOL! Welcome GonzoFamily!
>>Now let me get this straight. You're saying you don't carry 23 pound Gonzo around in the palm of one hand?

My hands are just not that big. hehehe

Actually I worry about him being hurt if I carry him any other way. He just plops on my shoulder and licks my hair while I carry him around.
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Gonzo, Tigger, and Stumpy

PHCurious Apr 25, 2003 05:53 PM

>> My hands are just not that big. hehehe
>>
>>Actually I worry about him being hurt if I carry him any other way. He just plops on my shoulder and licks my hair while I carry him around.
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>>Gonzo, Tigger, and Stumpy


He OWNS that shoulder!

I heart Gonzo.
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PHCurious
Cat Chat Host

PlatinumPrincess Apr 26, 2003 01:11 PM

My Chloe sounds a lot like Boris -- she doesn't ask to be held, she DEMANDS it!! Chloe, like a lot of Burmese, is a real "people purrson" -- loves to cuddle and snuggle and will insist it's time to be picked up by doing her Burmese YELLLLLL!If I don't stop whatever I'm doing for a quality kittysnuggle, Chloe moves on to phase two -- attempting to leap into my arms no matter what..Uh Oh ---OUCH!

Chloe's favorite postion is cradled in my left arm - paws hanging over my shoulder, head tilted to tuck under my chin -- of course accompanied by loud PURRRRRS!
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and Chloe

PHCurious Apr 27, 2003 09:13 PM

>>If I don't stop whatever I'm doing for a quality kittysnuggle, Chloe moves on to phase two -- attempting to leap into my arms no matter what..Uh Oh ---OUCH!

HAHA. I've got a kitty like this. And this explains the scabs and scars all over my upper body. DOH! The price we pay for having superaffectionate cats...

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PHCurious
Cat Chat Host

karlacue Apr 28, 2003 01:12 PM

>>>>If I don't stop whatever I'm doing for a quality kittysnuggle, Chloe moves on to phase two -- attempting to leap into my arms no matter what..Uh Oh ---OUCH!
>>
>>HAHA. I've got a kitty like this. And this explains the scabs and scars all over my upper body. DOH! The price we pay for having superaffectionate cats...

Yah, just look at my back...All scratched from when Bob wants to jump up...People must think that I self-mutilate, MOL
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Bob, Daisy, Karla and the Goldfish

PHCurious May 02, 2003 02:47 PM

>>Yah, just look at my back...All scratched from when Bob wants to jump up...People must think that I self-mutilate, MOL
>>-----
>>Bob, Daisy, Karla and the Goldfish

I was once getting a check up, and when the physician pulled back the gown and saw my skin, she said, "What the hell?" (How's that for a confidence booster?) I panicked thinking I was going to have to explain that I got these scratches from cats being affectionate, not aggressive. But all I had to say was, "I have cats..." The doc interrupted me and showed me a few scars on her arms. She acquired them from one of her kitties who always wanted to be held.

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PHCurious
Cat Chat Host