First off, I'd like to thank the fine people at Airborne Express for swinging by today to reject my shipment of reptiles. Seriously, it really makes me feel good. I had nothing else to do but wait six hours for the guy to show up, and then tell me that I couldn't ship it. God Bless you, kind sir, *sniff*.
Secondly, I'd like to tip my hat to all of the ignorant bastards who make decisions at any of the carriers to disallow all snakes. This is a brave, strong move, which is sure to increase sales and image. I mean, think of it ... we might piss off a few "crazy people" who find beauty in what God has created, but we sure won't have to worry about having a "nasty old headline" that a python escaped in our cargo room and ate the rats that live there. Oh, the horrors.
Thirdly, major props to Northwest for seeing an undercrowded market and jacking up the rates to near insanity, at $85 bucks a package. Now, for your $25,000 snake, that might not seem a lot, but when your animal is $85 bucks, that's, well, roughly 100% of the value of the animal. I'm no mathemagician here, but this could potentially have an adverse effect on this trade (ya think?).
Fourthly, major Eff Off to Delta Dash, for requiring verified shippers. They'll come to my house, and inspect it, to make sure that what, I can tape up a box? Label a box? Put the cap back on the Sharpie? Help me out here.
Fifthly, it's nice to see that the rich (NW, Delta) get rich, and the poor (herpers selling their animals for next to nothing) get screwed. You know, the last time I checked, it wasn't snakes that hijack planes, it's humans. So doing this all under the guise of "protecting the customer" is simply ludicrous.
And finally, this is an excellent chance for someone to make a lot of money... someone who is an enterprising individual, an entrepeneur if you will. Find people to become verified shippers through Delta Dash (make your own little network of friends all around the US) and offer your services to the people who can't get verified. They can drop the box off at your house, and you make weekly trips to Delta Cargo (say, always and only on a wednesday until business picks up). That way, you can provide a service to us, and save us money off of Northwest's pricing. Maybe even get a cut / partnership with DDash. I tell you, it's foolproof.
I think that tomorrow I'm going to buy a box of 5000 crickets. Punch a hole in the side, and "tape" it up with a piece of a fruit rollup on the inside. I'll drop it off at airborne, and by the time I'm gone, they'll have eaten through the fruit rollup, and dispersed throughout the facility. Airborne takes crickets, but not reptiles. Maybe if we can get enough crickets crammed in their warehouse, they'll HAVE to start taking reptiles to get rid of them.
Arrrrrrrg.
aaron
