Reptile & Amphibian Forums

It seems like every year, folks want to stop at night to tell stories instead of look for snakes... So I wanted to see if we could get it out of the way before we really kick off this season. I have heard of folks stopping to pee and find an alterna or something. I know that folks have some good stories... Maybe you guys will join in or something.

So here goes... The first year I was out collecting, many rookie mistakes were made. The first funny thing that happened was on the way out to Del Rio. I was with a friend named John and we were driving down I-20. Heading towards abilene. We were about an hour and a half out of Dallas, Fort Worth area. My friend John had his head out the window while I was driving.
All of the sudden I heard a huge WHAP! and then a SCREAM... STEEEEEVVVVVEEEEEE I got STUNG BY A BEEEEEEEEEEEE. He turned his head towards me an their was a huge bee stuck to his forehead. I laughed my A$$ off. It was hilarious. So the whole trip and every gas station we stopped at, everybody focused on the kid with a huge whelp on his head the size of a GOLF BALL. (Since of course this is Texas and I can exagerate a bit). This was a true story and it happened in 1992. Funny as hell.

Well the first wasn't really a snake story, so I guess I better tell a snake story. Nevermind, lets just go with another funny story.

2003) Lance and I were out on the River and this was our first night out. It was late, about 2am in the morning and I was getting tired. (You know how it is the first night after making a long drive). Lance and I were parked on the big hill in one of the pull offs after just finished walking and I said you know, I am sleepy so I am going to crash for a bit. Well Lance and I both had walkie talkies so we could chat while walking cuts... So he said that nature was a calling and the he was going to go for a quick break to work on project duex.
He was also carrying his 3billion battery powered spotlight. (I swear that thing could blind a bat.) Anyway he left the truck, and he clicked on the walkie just to see if we could hear each other. And then the light disappeared in the distance. I had just closed my eyes and started to relax when all of the sudden I heard a bunch of static on the walkie... crrr crrr crrr.. I looked up and saw the spotlight going nuts... The light was going everywhere... I was on the walkie in like 2 seconds going whats up whats up... I couln't make out what he was saying on the walkie so when he got back to the truck I was wide awake wondering what was up. Did he find an alterna? Did he see illegals crossing the river? What? When he gets to the truck he is laughing his A$$ off.. He then explains that he walked out over the wall to a nice secluded spot. He then dropped trow
and started to relax when he heard a rustling nows in the bushes about 30 feet away. He turned on the light, and a large javelina started charging him. He said he was trying to get the pants up and and the light was on and trying to run at the same time to jump the wall. The picture of this in my mind has made me laugh hard till this day. He then finished the story be saying "nothing chases a turd back up like a wild boar"...
Bwahahahahahaahahahahaahahahahaahaha...
Enjoy,

Steve

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I had the previledge to hunt the last couple years with an experienced south west Texas regular.........I roll up on him last year in the middle of some excitement, his truck was up on an embankment, there were some folks running around with flashlights, looked something like Whitewater canyon on a weekend night! Steve says he got bit as I reach the window of his truck........by this.......... he holds up a pickle jar with an alterna in it! Then he says, wait maybe it was this one .......he holds up another ! Turns out he found a male alterna crossing river road. He was showing another herper the spot when another male decided to cross in the same spot! That sparked an all out frenzy search for a female in the area. The next night Steve bangs on my door at the Easter Egg at like 5:30 am, maybe 1/2 hr after I call it quits..... He says ......I got the blonde if you got the beer! Dude finds a blonde suboc on the way in ! Unbelievable!

I remember that. That was great. Some guys have all the luck. I think your trip and ours wasn't bad, but it wasn't THAT GOOD either. Man... Please tell me he isn't going to be in Val Verde the week of may 15th... The rest of us want to catch some alterna too.

Take Care,

Steve

Hey coach, did you coach in Brownsboro Tx.??

Never coached there...........I'm in N.Y.

The best story I ever heard but did not witness was when Frank Reetis found a D.O.R. alterna and tied a fishing line around its neck and laid it out on dirt Pandale. Along came Bob Haase and a friend. They stopped and while they were gooning over it Frank was going to reel it in slowly, the line got stuck in the bushes and when he tugged on it it came loose and the snake went flying through the air, never to be seen again. Bob and his friend were TOTALLY confused, Frank was in the bushes laughing his a$$ off and when Bob realized what was going on, you can imagine the conversation, well I hope you can, cause I can't repeat it.

I think I may have told this before, but here goes....

One spring break (when Lance was at TAMU) he decided to go down to Freer and hunt annulata for a few days. Quite independently, a friend of mine was coming in from Boston and we were going down to SoTex as well.

Several days into our trip, we were in the Freer area and since it was midmorning, we knew Lance would probably be sleeping in his truck under "the bridge". So we drove down under the bridge and there was his truck. We pull up and honk the horn once. Instead of seeing him come out of the truck. We see a head pop up for a second of the long grass on the other side of the fence. Then it disappears again. About 30 seconds later up he pops again and he starts hurrying back towards us, one long leap at a time, with a roll of toilet paper is his right hand.

The guy I was with (who didn't know Lance at the time) quite spontaneously said "Oh look, it's Heidi!".

Dr. Pepper came shooting out my nose for a few seconds but once I regained composure, the name stuck. I have a hard time thinking of Msr. Benton as anything but Heidi, even 10 years later.
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Chris Harrison

NP

Here's another of my favorite true herping adventure stories....

A friend of mine (we'll call him him RN to protect his honor) was roadhunting somewhere along the TX coast. Late that night, he was caught by surprise by nature's call and had to pull off onto a "little side road" to relieve the internal problem he was having.

He finished and moved on home, not giving a second thought to his deed. The next morning, his phone rings...

"Are you RN of 123 Main Street?" calls an angry voice from the other end of the phone.

"Uhh,...yes,...I am" answers the perplexed friend.

"Were you on my drieway down near the town of ****** last night?" fumes the caller.

"Uhh,...no, I wasn't," lies RN, rather defensively.

"Well, somebody was! And they sh*t all over your wallet!!"

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Chris Harrison

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That is F'ing hilarious... Wow... I don't know what it is but when it comes to herpers and crapping, it just cracks me up.

Lance said you guys used to leave "gifts" for people in the middle of the road.

That too is hilarious...

Steve

I am glad you were protecting my "honor". My wife tells this story every chance she gets to every herper she thinks will listen. Every herp lab at A&M from 96 - 99 got the full details usually with me standing right there. It is hard to teach a group of people about the finer points of herp identification when you know they are thinking about you crapping on your wallet.
rn

I've been traveling to West Texas since the 60's so I have a pile of great stories. Just to start off, I'll relate one from about 15 years ago.

Bob Young and I had just pulled in to Comstock in the early evening. It was still quite light out so we were running up and down Juno Road with hours to go until dark. Heading in our direction is a sharp little import convertable with the top down. As we approach each other, it begins to slow down to greet us. It's immediately obvious that they are snake hunters but low and behold, it's two fine young ladies in cut-offs and halter tops! Snake hunting! (No, this is not a Penthouse letter!)

Well, I look down out the driver's window window and using the most commonly heard phrase ever heard on the roads of Val Verde County, I greeted them with a friendly, "GETTIN' ANY?!" Bob cracks up and starts poking me in the ribs. I turn beet-red and start stuttering, trying to keep my composure. The ladies never missed a beat. They replied "Just a dead atrox up the road. Hope y'all have a good night." and they were down the road.

Cheers, Terry Vandeventer (See everyone in June!)

Looks like you guys were catching more than snakes...

Nothing wrong with that.

Steven

This is a true story that happened in 1998. Not funny.. Just a story.

In 1998 I took my girlfriend (now wife) out for her first collecting trip to Val Verde County. Luckily we had partnered with Stu T. to make the trip down. (If you don't know Stu, he is a great guy). Before we made the trip, Dianna (My Wife) had taken our 1994 Black Honda Civic Si to the car wash to get it cleaned and had the oil changed. I didn't know she was going to do this but it was fine with me. Well we were on the way down about 60 miles outside of Sonora and we heard a loud clunk under the car.
>I was like "What was that???"...
>Dianna "I don't know"
So we kept on driving. Another 10 miles down the road the oil light comes on. It only came on when we were on a hill or took a sharp turn. I was getting quite nervous. We still were 30 miles outside of Sonora. As luck would have it, we made it all the way to Sonora without getting stuck or blowing the engine.
Once in town I looked under the car and GUESS WHAT? No drain plug in the pan... No F'ING DRAIN PLUG IN THE PAN! i was hot.. Way Hot! Luck runs across our path again as STU T. Pulls into Sonora at the same time. I explain what is going on, and we attempt to find a new plug in this small town. Well, after the one real parts store, nobody had a drain plug that would fit. So we purchased on that was close, and Stu talked the guy at the gas station (that was closing)to tap out the tank to fit the new plug. Well, even after driving almost 60 miles without a plug, the engine still ran perfectly. It did still have quite a bit of oil in the pan. Filled the car back up with oil, and proceeded to have a good trip. No alterna that trip, but it was fun. I also got to witness a Marriage at the Langry Museum. Great trip...

Steven O.