You say that your monitor has stopped charging you when you reach in to clean and water him. That's awesome! He's learning that you won't try to pick him when you reach in.
Please try and understand that they don't like being picked up. I can't imagine a monitor ever liking it. But if they trust you, they won't mind too much. That should be your goal.
If I were you, I'd start putting my hands near the monitor to smell often. Let him learn that the hands can come near him without touching him (they don't like that either, haha). Also, let the touching be of his own accord. Put your hand or arm near him. (I do this in the tub) Let him decide to step on it and over it to walk away. Don't move a muscle. He'll learn nothing bad happens when he walks over you.
Whenever I carry mine somewhere, I always let them walk off of me. In my male's case, he usually sits there a minute, hissing, before he slowly starts stepping off. Sometimes I'm in a hurry, but I wait it out. I think it helps a bit for him to feel free, and stepping off of me of his own decision. He's way nicer now than three years ago. This is just my experience, I really don't know much about taming them. Just be nice to them. Respect how they feel about physical contact.
Good luck, and good job so far!
D.