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SHIPPENSBURG JOURNAL (Pennsylvania) 10 June 05 I'm gonna sack me some snakes! (Kelly Youngblood)
Everyone round the up young 'uns and get into the truck 'cause we's goin' to the 2nd Annual Shippensburg Snake Hunt.
Well, not me particularly. The sack totin', slithering reptile hunting men of Shippensburg will actually be the ones who venture into the mountains of Cumberland County to find rattlesnakes, copperheads or black snakes. PA only has 3 venomous species, and they're hunting all of them.
If you're still lost, let me explain. Those who register for rattlesnake and/or reptile licenses are eligible to go into the woods in search of the biggest, baddest, tail-rattlin'-est snake they can find, capture it in a sack and bring it back to Shippensburg Fairgrounds to be measured.
It only gets better! They've imported Oklahoma Diamonbacks for the men's sack race, where those competing have to capture 5 venomous snakes as quickly as possible to win. Gosh! This much fun should just simply be illegal...
And why import snakes? It's not like a number of them wouldn't have already been caught and available. Are OUR snakes not poisonous enough for you? Let's bring in foreign venomous snakes instead. And if some get out, maybe they will breed and produce even more diamondbacks! Think of all the money they'll save on importing!
You know what else? We could add a snake bite competition. Whichever contestant can get bitten the most times without going into convulsions and falling over wins $50. I mean, that'll make up for the loss of circulation to your limbs and bodily functions. Oh, the possibilties!
But no worries about being bitten this year. No sir! According to the Cumberland Valley EMS, they have been asked to have 2 ambulances on hand in addition to the First Aid Station and a helicopter for extreme injuries. But you better not get bitten if there's an emergency elsewhere. The ambulances are only obligated to stay unless they get a call. When I asked about anti-venom, no one had an answer as to whether or not it would be on hand. I would assume it is, but shouldn't someone, SOMEWHERE know for sure? Are these the hands you want to put your life in for 2 days?
Besides, the PA Fish & Game Commission says, "reports of venomous snakebites in Pennsylvania are rare... All of these species are usually non-aggressive and prefer to avoid confrontation." Well that's comforting. Not too much to worry about. The commission adds that "bites usually occur while a person is trying to catch or carelessly handle one of these snakes." Hmm..there's none of that going on here, now is there?
Does anyone else feel like they're in the "Whacking Day" episode of the Simpsons? The only difference is that the residents of Springfield had enough brains to realize it could be harmful and traumatic to mess with nature's creatures. I'm suprised PETA isn't all over this one.
Think I'm blowing this out of proportion? Other parts of the country are just as confused as I am by people finding pleasure in this sport of hunting snakes. Florida was introduced to this strange hobby last year when Dave Barry mentioned the 2004 hunt in his weblog on the Miami Herald website.
But maybe these people are smarter than we think. They say they take the snakes back to where they were originally found, but I can't see someone riding to the mountains to EVERY SINGLE LOCATION with hundreds of venomous reptiles in their vehicle. I think they lure in all of their competitors to the middle of the fairgrounds and then release the snakes. "Come on Billy-Bob-Jo-Martin-Bubba. We gotta let them there snakes into the grass so everyone stays inside." The intelligence radiating around the hunt's planners is, no doubt, immense.
You can also camp there for the weekend. I shouldn't even have to say anything about this after the last paragraph.
There are non-venomous sack races for women and children. Only the tough men are allowed to mess with the venomous snakes. However, if the event was planned by women, then I am definitely underestimating the intelligence level I mentioned previously. "Yeah Betty..We'll send all the men after the poisonous ones...Life insurance policy, here I come!"
There is more than just huntings snakes, however. Other activities include fishing, paintball, demonstrations and, my personal favorite, head mounts of record white-tailed deer bagged throughout the United States. There is also a fire truck parade that boasts more than 50 pieces of equipment. If you're an arsenist on the other side of the county, next weekend is the time to strike!
Also, don't forget to pick up your memorabilia. Your friends from out of town would never believe you otherwise.
So, that's what the void in my life has been all of these years. I haven't bagged myself a large venomous snake for fun. What on earth could I have been thinking? I mean, that's one for the resume.
Even though I will most likely miss out this year, I still hope I get invited to the bullet dodging competition. I hear they're handing out FREE bullseye shirts....
I'm gonna sack me some snakes!

the lines:
"The sack totin', slithering reptile hunting men of Shippensburg will actually be the ones who venture into the mountains of Cumberland County to find rattlesnakes, copperheads or black snakes. PA only has 3 venomous species, and they're hunting all of them"
They could cause the uneducated to believe that THOSE 3 snakes ARE the venomous ones, unnecessarily slighting the black rats. Otherwise a good piece of WTF work!
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Tom
TCJ Herps
"The more people I meet, the more I like my snakes"