Reptile & Amphibian Forums

Hello Everyone,

This is MacArthur's Mom - I hadn't been on here for a while to screen my son's postings - obviously, a mistake on my part. He doesn't know I'm on here right now, but I want to apologize for his comment about the sand. I will be having a talk with him later today and will have him make his own apology to you. I don't blame all of you for being offended, I would be offended at that remark too.

The only comment I take exception to is the one made about our family being messed up. Yes, my son was out of line when he made the comment about the sand, but whoever you are that made the comment about our family - you are also out of line.

I truly appreciate the advice that you have given him, believe me, he takes it to heart (most of the time). I may have misjudged his maturity level to post on a forum. Like I said before, this is the very first time he's been allowed to post on a forum like this. It seems that he needs to learn a few things about etiquette and the fact that tone is hard to express in writing and the people may not take things in the manner they are intended.

Again, I apologize. I hope he is still welcome here.

MacArthur's Mom

Hey,

I know I'm not one of the people that helped him in general, but I know how nice these people are and that they have helped me through so much, that's why I stood behind them and defended. Also, I am not clueless on Leo's so I help whoever I can as well. I am sure the people that helped him out would greatly appreciate you talking to you're son about how he has treated them. We know it's not you're fault. Thanks.

-Britney

I did help him out a couple times and I find his rudeness to be equivalent to an immature child. I know children his age who are caring for much more advanced reptiles than a leopard gecko...and their maturity often surprises me. I had thought, now proven wrongly, that he was mature enough to handle the responsibility he took upon himself when he obtained this gecko...which, regardless of his feelings on the matter, should have the best possible life it can be provided in captivity. This includes keeping it healthy, well fed and making sure its dietary and physical needs are kept. Sand, whether fine ground or larger grain, is not good for ANY animals digestive track unless they're birds or another animal evolved to handle such things to aid in their digestion. Have you ever seen wet sand? How it clumps together? Imagine that in a digestive track where its getting roughened by stomach acids then constantly covered over by mucus because the body is trying to expel it. Now, usually it just blocks up the digestive tract.. however, it can also cause what is known as an iniceseption.. which is loops of bowl telescoping in on itself. Very painful and quite deadly. The only cure is surgery.. It also cause Interitis.. which is an infection in the abdominal cavity. All in all.. a nasty end to a fascinating creature that deserved much better. These things are why Leopard Geckos should not be kept on a sand or loose substrate.

Personally, I've only had my geckos for about 18 months...but I've hatched out 4 hatchlings already from fertile eggs and 3 more on the way.. My geckos are kept on Newspaper..or papertowels..provided calcium dishes and hides...I would never do something willfully to endanger my animal's health...and that is the responsibility you take on when you become the owner of an animal.. of any kind.

The people here are, for the most part, kind and very generous with their knowledge. They've helped me in the past with my questions and I in turn try to give back a little of that knowledge to the newer people coming to the Forum....your son's offhanded arrogance and rudeness is one of the main reasons alot of people don't speak up...They don't need a 12 yr old kid telling them knowledge they've accumulated in years of experience is wrong.. or not worth considering or even ignoring.

I do hope you see fit to teach your son some manners when dealing with people who help him...If not, I can't see him going very far in life... I'm sorry to say.. I mean no offense with that, its just the honest truth in my opinion.

Lucien

Sorry.. long winded post.. but this is a subject I feel rather strongly about.

Lucien,

I appreciate your advice, but you're obviously not hearing what I'm saying...this is my son's first time on a forum and unfortunately, he's learning a hard lesson here.

I understand you feel strongly about this subject, but this IS AN APOLOGY. I didn't put this out here for more tongue lashing.

I do hear what you're saying....and that was not meant as a tongue lashing... I was simply trying to make you aware of what the dangers are...and hoping your son would see the post as well so he could be aware of the dangers.....In everything, I'm simply more concerned for the animal's health than any hard feelings on anyone's part..The animals are why we're all here... if it weren't for them.. this place wouldn't exist in its current form... I'm sorry if you took my post as another lecture..

No problems and again, thank you for your advice. I'm not a reptile lover, as you can probably tell, but still, I wouldn't want any harm to come to Freddy as he is a living, breathing being. No hard feelings here.

We realize its not your fault...kids can be immature sometimes so I don't blame you at all. If he returns to his polite questions, then yes, he stillwill be welcome, but if he EVER portrays that arrogance again (I have never seen a post like that from ANY of the forum members) we will be asking him to leave because we don't want to have to deal with that cocky, pig headed attitude.

cleo
1:1 leos (4 eggs cooking)

Granted his 12, but still. I understand that you are his mother and mothers as general protect their children. Granted I dont have kids. But between my niece and my best friends 2 children. Trust I understand. BUt he should have been the one to apoligize not you. You did no wrong. He is 12 he should know between right and worng and what we say are OUR OPINONS thats all. AS MY OWN opinon. Im tired of answeering his questions and yet being told we are pretty much dumb asses for what we say. And that coming from a 12 year old..well it shouldnt be done. Even if he was to apologize it wont matter to atleast me because he was forced to do it by you.
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1 male HY(Winky), 1 Tang female(Sunshine), and 1 Tremper Albino female(Serenity)

Thank you for understanding - well somewhat anyway. My son was not "forced" to do anything. I simply made the suggestion that he should apologize and he did. It's often been said that no question is a stupid question, at least not to the person that is asking it, you apparently don't think this way.

Furthermore, like I said, he's learning a hard lesson here and he is truly sorry for what he's done. It's a shame that you are not a very forgiving person.

As a mother (and an adult), you should be more understanding and stop the name calling (as you did in your post).

It's pretty obvious that an apology is not going to be enough for you.

You know that fine. And actually I am a very forgving person. But yet when your son can say so many thins to offend us after how much we have done for him. Heck one guy even called (long distance) to help him find a breeder that was near him. We all looked for infor for him. BUt yet he can come off and say so many bad things about us and offend NOT ONLY me but many others. The yea its hard to forgive it like it never happend. People are intitled to their own opinon, cant crticize for that. But yet a 12 year old should respect peoples opinon especially when he is the one that as for it. I am not going to get into the name calling bit. I Wont go that level. Yet I would think a 12 year old should be able to fix his own problems like this one. There are many teenagers and younger on here and MANY show respect and act a lot older than their age. I also believe that this sight would not only show your son how to take care of his leo, but would also show him how to interact with people.

Thats my own opinon and not any others on here besides my self. Also as my own judgement I wont reply to any message that he does later ask, becaSue I have learned that by doing so that I dont know what the heck I am talking about any way. JUST ASK YOUR SON.
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1 male HY(Winky), 1 Tang female(Sunshine), and 1 Tremper Albino female(Serenity)

I am sorry about the comment about your family being messed up. Please explain to Mac that I meant nothing by it really. Just after the scalding we got in the past about him being a sensitive chiled and all and then seeing a post like that I was quite disturbed. I was completely out of line and it is not excuseable two wrongs do not make a right. I hope you accept my apology. - Gary Mason Jr.
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Even if your on the right track you will get run over if you just sit there
22 leos,1.1 redtail boas,1.1 rainbow boas,1.1 cornsnakes, 1.0 tokay gecko,1.0 veiled cham, 5 dogs and a cat. Oh, can't forget Tater my parrolet.

Apology accepted, thank you.

Like I had, I hadn't been on the forum for while to monitor what my son was posting and it was big mistake on my part. I know you all don't think so, but he really is a sensitive boy (although he certainly has not portrayed that image on this forum lately) and his feelings get hurt very easily - believe me, he's quite torn up about this whole issue.

You are most certainly right in being offended, by not only the comment he made about the sand, but also by the other comments that I'm just now learning about. I thank you again for being forgiving. Believe me when I say our family is not "messed up". I don't think I'd be here trying to clear up this situation if we were.

Mac's Mom

lol....i think i am the most sensitive person on the planet when it comes to animals. I became a vegetarian because we were at an agricultural fair and i saw the baby veal cows, and i got so upset at how young and weak they looked. i still get very uspet when i see roadkill and cried when my mom hit a squirrel with our car by accident...lol. i am such a tree hugger its almost pathetic, so if you want to see a sensitive person, you have to talk to me

Cleo
1:1 leos (4 eggs cooking)

That sd thing is that one time I hit a squirrel and I cried the entire time on the way home. The funny part is that lastnight my boyfriend was drving my car, and he stopped in the middle of to road so he wouldnt hit a squirrel when i was in the car. lol. Traffic was a little backed up lol. I am a sucker for animals. Between my boyfriend and I are pets are funny. I have 3 leos, 1 dog (german shep. akita mix) a rubber maid container for of crix, some buttterworms, wax worms, mealies and so forth. He was A rat and 3 german shepards. One full house after we get married lol.
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1 male HY(Winky), 1 Tang female(Sunshine), and 1 Tremper Albino female(Serenity)

Thank you for making the time to come on here and explain things. Also thanks for talking to your son about forum behavior :-]. Many of us care very deeply for our fellow animals and only want the best for new people entering the world of pets, and to also help make the experence of a first reptile to be the best. :-]

I just read all the posts in this thread and although some say that he should have apologized on his own, as a parent I know better. Sometimes children have to be pushed to do the right thing. That's part of the parenting experience. If she hadn't told her son to apologize, what kind of parent would she be? Kudos to you, MacArthur's Mom!

No...thank you Sybella!