my Argus monitor hated me at first, but with a lot of patience and time he began trusting me. don't get me wrong though he is still definitely no lap pet and will still growl or whip if I disturb him to much. I never really try to hold mine unless I need to such as for a bath or cleaning his cage. in my opinion I believe most of them should just be appreciated rather than handled but some don't mind it but others do. I wish you and your monitor the best of luck .