Even the Class III vests don't meet the requirement, wtf.

Actually, they do...that's why they meet ANSI specifications. They EXCEED the snake-vest requirement.

What I WILL say, is that I wouldn't call them "vests," but more like "shirts," and if you're buying one for your kid (since they also must comply), it's more like a "robe."
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Chris McMartin
www.mcmartinville.com
I'm Not a Herpetologist, but I Play One on the Internet