OK, first of all, there is no such thing as a non-venomous tarantula. There are only a couple of species of spider that do not have venom. Also, tarantula venom is completely different from bee venom. Many experts argue that, due to the size of the peptides in the venom, it is impossible to have an allergic reaction to it.
Having said that you still want to avoid being bitten alltogether so look for a docile species. I've never been bitten in 9 years. Bites, even from defensive species, are rare.
One thing to also consider is the urticating setae that many tarantulas posess. These "hairs" han be rubbed off their abdomen and can cause itching. It is possible to have an allergy to the chemicals in the setae. There are many types of urticating setae and the Mexican species posess the itchiest type (Type III), and many of them are very prone to flicking them off (Redknees are the worst).
Hands down, my top of the list recommendation is Grammostola pulchra (Brazillian black). This is arguably the most docile tarantula and is a real beauty too. The next most docile tarantula I know of is the Aphonopelma hentzi (Texas brown). My kids (4-7) handle this one all the time.
Here is my list of recommended species, based on docility and least prone to flick setae:
Grammostola pulchra (Brazillian black)
Aphonopelma hentzi (Texas brown)
Aphonopelma chalcodes (desert blonde)
Aphonopelma sp. "New River" (New River rustrump)
Grammostola rosea (Chilean rose)
Grammostola pulchripes (Chaco goldenknee)
Brachypelma verdezi (Mexican rose grey)
Brachypelma albopilosum (Curlyhair)
Brachypelma emilia (Mexican redleg)
Crassicrus lamanai (cinnamon)
Eupalaestrus campestratus (pink zebra beauty)
I have pictures of many of these species in my gallery:
http://gallery.tarantulas.us/gallery/v/thevez2/
If I don't have it, pics are here too:
http://gallery.tarantulas.us/gallery/v/tarantulas/
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KJ Vezino
My Gallery
Missouri Tarantula Enthusiasts Group
