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I have an 18 year old black short hair cat who is in end stage renal failure. At the end of Dec 2011 the vet told me that he probably only has a few months left to live. He is still doing OK, although he is losing weight, his appetite is significantly decreased and he is sleeping more. I hold him constantly and give him pretty much whatever he wants and help him out around the house (pick him up and put him on the bed, etc...). Yesterday I took my 16 year old brown tabby to the vet to get a dental check and when I brought her home my sick boy started hissing at her. She is completely deaf, so she doesn't always "heed the warning" since she can't hear him. I figured it was the smell of the vet on her so I put a little rubbing alcohol in my hands and rubbed it on both of them to even up the playing field. Today though, he is hissing at her if she looks at him or comes anywhere near him, which is really unusual for him (he is normally the gentlest and easy going kind of cat). So any idea why my sick boy is all of a sudden hating the other cat and being so aggressive? This is not their typical behavior together.

Hi. I had two brothers from the same litter/same age that were inseparable. They were glued together... Stanley passed away at age 16 from kidney failure and complications, Pookey at age 19 from a brain tumor.

The last week I had Stanley, Pookey hid out and I rarely saw him. Their relationship totally changed. Whether it was the smells of the vet or he knew how sick Stanley was. There was no hissing, but there was a complete personality change.

I am sure your cat know something is wrong -- both the sick one and the healthy one -- and it is affecting how they get along.

It took Pookey close to a year to get his balance back after losing Stanley. He was in bad shape (meowing constantly and searching) for about 6 months, and then slowly got better until he was in new routines at about a year...
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Tammy
& Sparkle
(Stanley 8/91 - 8/07)
(Pookey 8/91 - 11/10)

I am so sorry for the loss of your two furbabies Now my sick boy is hissing at almost everyone and everything. He is also hiding, I think that this may be his last mile. I just put him on his down comforter and hopefully he will stay there for awhile and go to sleep because my nerves are shot. I am going to call the vet tomorrow and see if I can get him some sort of anti anxiety med, if I can't then I need to consider that it might be time Feeling sad.

Stanley was my first cat that I had to make the decision on. I had a good bit of guilt. I wondered if I should have waited longer. PH KitKat helped alot. She lost a cat (Timothy, I believe) just before Stanley. What she basically said is that she knew it was time when he no longer loved doing things. When he lost interest. That is what happened to Stanley. He stopped eating (unless I really worked with him/forced him) and he stayed in the same spot for hours. He no longer did his very favorite things -- had no interest. That is when I knew he was just barely hanging on and was probably in pain but not showing it. I still to this day have a lot of guilt. Pookey was an easier decision, he had significant physical signs (I won't go into it), but it was clear it was time.

You'll know. When he no longer does the things he likes and loses interest in everything.
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Tammy
& Sparkle
(Stanley 8/91 - 8/07)
(Pookey 8/91 - 11/10)

My heart goes out to you right now, having to face this. It is an awful time. I waited a little over a year before adopting again, thinking I never would. Then I met Sparkle. I've had her about 2 months now. She helps me remember the good and not the final days.
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Tammy
& Sparkle
(Stanley 8/91 - 8/07)
(Pookey 8/91 - 11/10)

Thanks for sharing your experience, you helped ease my mind. I am so baffled. I made an appt for my vet to come to my house on Monday and put him down (I love my vet for doing this for him) and no sooner did I do that, my sick boy is all of a sudden up and at 'em and eating .... GAAH! I feel like this is some ugly roller coaster ride of guilt and anxiety. But you have a good point, he doesn't do things he enjoys anymore. He does just sleep for 6-8 hours during the day. He only gets up to drink/eat (very little) and use the litter box. He doesn't even want to sit on my lap and snuggle anymore. So even though he is looking better, I think it may still be time. I know I don't feel happy for him anymore, when I look at him, I just feel sad inside. I guess that is the answer that I was looking for. Please pray for us!

The vet will help you know when it is time. Stanley essentially stopped eating the last week of his life (he had lost a good bit of weight up to that point, but ate and was active). He rarely moved and had no interest in anything other than sleeping in a certain spot. We tried a strong appetite stimulant to help him eat the last 24 hours before the decision was made, but it didn't do any good. He went to the dish and stared at the food and walked away. Not eating enough to sustain themselves and total lack of interest is a big sign they are just hanging on and are probably not feeling well internally. I am glad your vet is coming by. If he has a big rally this weekend, eating and all, you may want to wait a little longer... Only you know based on his quality of life right now.
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Tammy
& Sparkle
(Stanley 8/91 - 8/07)
(Pookey 8/91 - 11/10)

Hello,

I just read this entire thread and I am so sorry for all you are going through with your baby. I have been there many times myself so I really understand.

Behavioral changes in very sick cats are not unusual, even if they seem to be positive changes. Sometimes sick kitties become more affectionate, but I think they are more likely to isolate themselves. Occasional they seem to improve right before they pass........I like to believe that they know they will soon be at peace. Often dying cats will purr.

There is nothing more difficult than having to let go of one of our precious babies. They are such a huge part of our lives and love us unconditionally. I see euthanasia as a final gift we give our babies when nothing else can be done for them.

If you are interested, we have pet loss chats here. It helps to be able to be around others who understand what you are going through. We also have message boards if chats are not of interest to you.

I will be sure to check this board tomorrow, as well as the Pet Loss chat tomorrow. Please feel free to post again anytime.

You have been given excellent advice by the other poster

Regards,
PHKitkat

I just want you to know I am thinking about you. I know today was the day the vet was scheduled to visit. When you have time, please let me know you are OK.
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Tammy
& Sparkle
(Stanley 8/91 - 8/07)
(Pookey 8/91 - 11/10)

I am so sorry that I never came back, it was a crazy week with both of my cats. My sick boy rallied back, so I cancelled the vet visit and the vet agreed. That being said, he is miserable again now, so his rally was short lived. I am going to take him in tomorrow and end his misery. He is hiding and growling at everyone, it is not a happy or healthy situation for anyone anymore. My other cat (16 year old in renal failure) had to have oral surgery last week, she had 4 teeth extracted, so that kept me off of my game.

I am glad we had this last week together, I think it really made the difference between "wondering" if the time is right and "knowing" ....

Thank you for all of your support and encouragement.

I am sad for the decision you have to make today and how your heart will break, but I am glad to hear this last week gave you peace, you are now sure.

I'll keep you all in my thoughts.
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Tammy
& Sparkle
(Stanley 8/91 - 8/07)
(Pookey 8/91 - 11/10)

Kramer crossed the Rainbow Bridge last night. Thank you for all of your support and encouragement that helped me get through this. I know it was the best thing I could do for him. My friend gave me this little poem, that really made me feel much better about my decision.

Better a week too soon than a moment too late, they say.
Better while the eyes still sparkle than wait til they dull.
Better while the good days outnumber the bad.
... Better when it's hard for us than hard for them.
It will never be easy for us.
... As stewards of these great creatures,
We have the opportunity to give one final gift.
Peace.
We grant them peace in lieu of our own.

Thank you for sharing the poem. I am glad you have peace. I had sadness and uncertainty with Stanley (probably because he was my first in which I had to make the decision). I was much more sure and had sadness, but no guilt with Pookey. He had a more dramatic decline. I only hoped you were in the same place when you made the decision, as well, and it sounds like you are.
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Tammy
& Sparkle
(Stanley 8/91 - 8/07)
(Pookey 8/91 - 11/10)

It's so very difficult when any of us have to make the big decision..........my thoughts and prayers remain with you.

Regards,
PHKitkat

Thank you for the prayers. Kramer crossed the Rainbow Bridge last night. My friend sent me this poem two days ago and it let me know I was making the best decision for him.

Better a week too soon than a moment too late, they say.
Better while the eyes still sparkle than wait til they dull.
Better while the good days outnumber the bad.
... Better when it's hard for us than hard for them.
It will never be easy for us.
... As stewards of these great creatures,
We have the opportunity to give one final gift.
Peace.
We grant them peace in lieu of our own.

{{{{{}}}}}

The poem your friend wrote is very beautiful......

Take care,
PHKitkat

All of our cats hiss at each other. All the time when they are upset or angry or just ready to fight!