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RE: my cat is afraid of new cat

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Posted by: kinga at Tue Aug 31 21:56:06 2004  [ Report Abuse ] [ Email Message ] [ Show All Posts by kinga ]  
   

Firstly, I know what you're going through! But believe me, it will get better. There are a few basic things that may help you in your situation. Most importantly, don't try to be fair. By this I mean don't try to help the situation the way you would with humans; you'll just end up getting nowhere and the cats will get frustrated. Cats have a unique code of conduct all of their own. As you probably already know, even the most easy going cat will get affected if things don't go their way. For one, any change in environment, such as moving house, new pets, etc., is NOT a good thing for a cat. So its no
surprise Maggie is resentful of Sage popping up on the scene. You, as "head cat", have to restore order by supporting Sage's right to space and privacy. I know it may seem cruel to Sage, but cats don't think that way. Sage will see this as normal boundary forming and will learn to accept it. You can do this in a variety of ways: keep Maggie's bed and food on a higher level than Sage's (whilst still feeding at the same times). This shows Maggie she need not feel threatened by the newcomer, whilst Sage will learn about her lower rank in the house (this is what I mean about not trying to be "fair" - cats' understanding of "fair" is completely different, they need and expect boundary formation). Keep Maggie's toys out of reach of Sage and show Maggie only she has access to them. You can also designate times when Maggie has complete run of the house without Sage being present. Give Maggie special time alone with yourself, doing things you both normally enjoy doing together, even if its just being in the same room together (she may act bitterly towards you for a while, but persevere; remember, she looks to you to maintain order in the house, and so far she feels angry with your "management rules"!). Anyway, you get the general drift. Maggie must be made to feel of prime importance. Secondly, when contact is inevitable, there are a few simple rules. When Maggie starts getting aggressive, DO NOT scold her. In fact, don't pay any attention to her. Instead, from a short distance keep reassuring both cats in a calming tone ("good kitties, beautiful cats", etc.). ONLY interfere if you feel Maggie is feeling cornered or extremely unsafe. In this case, remove Sage from the room without making
a fuss over her and go back to comforting Maggie, giving her some breathing space before reintroducing Sage onto the scene. Keep giving your affection and attention to Sage down to a minimum in front of Maggie, until things get better. Instead, speak kindly of Sage in front of Maggie when they're both in the room, saying things like 'Sage is a good cat' etc. But don't
overdo it. Stop if you feel Maggie getting jealous or stiff.
If this happens, immediately revert your attention to Maggie.
You may find some of this cruel or hard, but it works and is the closest you'll get to resolving disputes in a "feline fashion". Good luck and don't give up!!!


   

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