OMG! Next time you give a post like that, give warning! I want to make sure I put down my drink before I spew all over the screen

I'm looking forward to your Christmas this year

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she always says, "There isn't anything on the East Coast we want to see/do..." NOTHING to do on the EAST COAST??? I always counter, "I don't come to Iowa because it is the mecca of civilization..."
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I use to always keep a couple bottles of wine on hand for drop by guests. Big Scary Man wasn't much of a wine drinker, but one night he opened a bottle and liked it so much that when it ran out, he opened another.

Somewhere between "you're the bestest friend I've ever had..." and "Honey, I don't feel too good" he decided to re-open the discussion of where our next house should be - and decided that we were moving to Iowa. He claimed there is no culture east of the Mississippi, why are NYC and San Fran considered gay friendly when Iowa is so much better, great place for songwriters, best schools in the nation...Iowa is so great they don't even have crabgrass and our lawn would look better.

Next day I found he has never really been to Iowa.

And I haven't seen him drink more than a single drink in an evening since.

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